you’re just calling your child a dick tbh
my child is cute and adorable and will probably end up like me so maybe
YOU KIDS THESE DAYS AND YER FANCY “SPRINTING” AND “MOTION CONTROLS”
WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE WE COULDN’T MAKE LINK RUN FASTER
NO, WE HAD TO ROLL ACROSS HYRULE FIELD TO MAKE IT TO KAKARIKO BY NIGHTFALL
BAREFOOT, IN THE SNOW, TAPPING THE A BUTTON REPEATEDLY FOR 10 MILES
AND WE WERE GRATEFUL
"average person hath borne me on his back 3 times" factoid actualy just statistical error. average person hath borne me on his back 0 times. Alas, poor Yorick, who hath borne me on his back a thousand times, was an outlier adn should not have been counted
is it called peanut because it’s ugly and wrinkly
your dick is ugly and wrinkly and approximately the size of a peanut so try again
Girlf and peanut safely stashed in the back seat.
Shitty coffee in my cupholder.
A 30 minute drive home.
i’m fluent in talking shit